Friday, March 30, 2007
TALKING TO OTHERS ABOUT CHRISTIAN ETHICAL ISSUES
One of our adult Bible class teachers asked me questions along the following line: How can a Christian get a fair hearing from non-Christian friends about ethical issues where Christianity is so at odds with the surrounding culture? How does one stand clear and firm, yet not appear harsh or uncaring? Here is my response.
In days gone by there was often a bluntness and harshness on the part of Christians in addressing sin in the culture and in people's lives. It often struck me as an attitude of "well, I tried. I did my part or took care of my responsibility. Now if they go to hell it's not my fault. I told them the truth and they rejected it." I don't know that much love for the person was communicated. Or how much genuine love for the sinner the Christian actually felt.
In days gone by there was often a bluntness and harshness on the part of Christians in addressing sin in the culture and in people's lives. It often struck me as an attitude of "well, I tried. I did my part or took care of my responsibility. Now if they go to hell it's not my fault. I told them the truth and they rejected it." I don't know that much love for the person was communicated. Or how much genuine love for the sinner the Christian actually felt.
I think most of us are at the other end of the spectrum today. Not only have we reacted against that former scenario, but we are deeply affected by our culture. Americans have always emphasized the individual and rights. But there was also more of a corporate sense in days past. Now the individual and rights are king. On top of that, "tolerance" is the new idol.
So we don't want to unnecessarily offend (as maybe our parents did) and we are aware that our culture doesn't really allow much in the way of saying "this is wrong." Any negative comments are interpreted as bigoted and intolerant. This is the fact of life and no matter how hard we try to interact or critique and tell the truth with love, we will be seen in this light and interpreted as bigoted and intolerant. Your class is going to have to accept that this is how they will be viewed and treated by the world. They cannot avoid all "offense" at all cost.
The other complicating factor is that any rejection of common cultural values and assumptions (abortion, homosexuality, pre-marital sex, etc.) gets us lumped in with "right-wing" Christianity. I admit that this really bugs me. I do not want to be lumped in with Pat Robertson or Jerry Falwell. But again, that is how we will be stereotyped because of a surface agreement with them on a particular ethical issue.
So the task is not easy.
The first task is to settle our own convictions. Examine scripture, biblical theology, and self to get ourselves on solid ground. Worry about implementation later. First get our mind and heart right. Special attention must be given to "fuzzy" attitudes where we have soaked up cultural values by osmosis and not subjected them to biblical scrutiny. This is not necessarily the same thing as saying we must think and speak on certain topics as our parents did a generation ago. But we must be honest with the text and heart of God.
Once we know what we believe (or what of biblical necessity may indeed be "fuzzy") then we wrestle with how to communicate that in our world. There are two goals: be faithful and be effective. Those may often be in tension with each other.
Effectiveness wrestles with the "how" to communicate. And there are better and worse ways of doing it. But the temptation is to waver on faithfulness if communicating faithfulness doesn't get a good hearing. Again, we must accept that we won't always get a good hearing no matter how we massage the message.
But the first step in effectiveness is to examine our heart in terms of love for the lost. Is that our motive? Do we burn/hurt with wanting people to "get it." Passion is not dogmatism. Passion means we care. So get the motive right.
And pray for wisdom. People and circumstances vary. What is effective in one case might not be in another. Paul said "Since, then, we know what it is to fear the Lord, we try to persuade men." (II Cor. 5:11) Persuasion is a matter of knowledge, motive and skill.
Perhaps a good Jesus story is that of the rich young ruler. Jesus listened. He answered his question. It was a "hard" answer. Jesus allowed him to reject it and walk away. But the text also says (before Jesus gives his answer) that "Jesus looked at him and loved him." We have to truly see the person (not just as a potential convert, number to add, etc.) and we have to love them. And we have to be able to let them walk away because they will not make Jesus Lord. By the way, he even went away sad. And, of course, we don't know for sure that this was the end of the story of this man. But it was the end of his encounter with Jesus that day.
