Friday, April 04, 2008
THANK YOU, BROWNING
A dear friend died. What is amazing is that he was chairman of the elders of the church and I am the preaching minister. Unfortunately such warmth in that relationship is more rare than many might imagine. It wasn't that we were buddies or hung out together, but over the years the relationship had become close.
We communicated personally nearly every week and often multiple times in a week - by phone or email or in person. There was complete honesty and trust. No egg shells to walk on. No shading true feelings or opinions in order to keep things civil.
As a minister for whom an elder is "boss" Browning was a person I knew without reservation cared about my family and our well-being. One daughter said it was like losing a grandfather. Just last week I had picked something up at his house and he talked about his concern for his brother and sister-in-law as his brother was seriously affected by Alzheimer's. And I had talked with him in the past few years about dealing with my parents' care up to their deaths.
I remember when I interviewed 15 years years ago, Browning was my chauffeur to the hotel or airport and our conversations from the beginning were comfortable. He was my liaison elder for all these years and I am bold enough to say that our good relationship was of much value to the well-being of the church.
I will greatly miss him.
It is amazing how potent very small actions can be in their significance. When I deleted his name from my cell phone and from my email contacts, it broke my heart. Such a small act. The push of a button. It felt so wrong and disrespectful. One keystroke and he is off the list. But the hole in my heart and in my life is huge. That will always be there.
We communicated personally nearly every week and often multiple times in a week - by phone or email or in person. There was complete honesty and trust. No egg shells to walk on. No shading true feelings or opinions in order to keep things civil.
As a minister for whom an elder is "boss" Browning was a person I knew without reservation cared about my family and our well-being. One daughter said it was like losing a grandfather. Just last week I had picked something up at his house and he talked about his concern for his brother and sister-in-law as his brother was seriously affected by Alzheimer's. And I had talked with him in the past few years about dealing with my parents' care up to their deaths.
I remember when I interviewed 15 years years ago, Browning was my chauffeur to the hotel or airport and our conversations from the beginning were comfortable. He was my liaison elder for all these years and I am bold enough to say that our good relationship was of much value to the well-being of the church.
I will greatly miss him.
It is amazing how potent very small actions can be in their significance. When I deleted his name from my cell phone and from my email contacts, it broke my heart. Such a small act. The push of a button. It felt so wrong and disrespectful. One keystroke and he is off the list. But the hole in my heart and in my life is huge. That will always be there.
